High Protein Lemon Coconut Poppyseed Muffins

It seems my last post hit a nerve. Maybe it’s that a lot of us are in a place in our lives that is inexplicably complicated. Struggling to haul ourselves out of bed to face the world for galaxies of different reasons. Too poor to buy food for our families, too tired to play with our kids, too busy to clean the toilet, too depressed to open the curtains. But my last post wasn’t supposed to be sad or depressing. Far from it.

My last post was meant to convey that I’ve reached a stage in my life where I realize that there is so much more to it then what I’ve given it thus far. Life is hard and the people in it make it complicated, lovely, exhausting, joyful, fun, difficult, terrifying and ultimately worth every second of tears and belly laughs. Decisions we make for ourselves can seem selfish as every decision made affects those around us, especially those we love and cherish. But one must, at some point in our life, make painful or terrifying decisions.
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Chocolate Chip Pancakes

A lot goes on behind the scenes of a blog, which is really just a window into someone’s life…or however much of it they wish for you to see.

Sometimes I feel like grabbing a megaphone and shouting from the rooftops about all that’s going on in my life. I want everyone to know what I’m doing, where I’m going and who I’m doing it with. And then there are times when I want to crawl under a rock that is hidden far below the sea with a million pounds pushing down on it and nothing but the silence of the waves to listen to. Those are the times when posting a recipe about what I made last week seems utterly irrelevant. I start to wonder why I’m doing this. Did I start this site to provide recipes to the public? Did I start it as a way for me to get things off my chest? Is anyone really listening anyway?
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Dinner with a Chef – John Brooks

Some people who have been invited to my home for dinner are often intimidated by me, whizzing about the kitchen at a frantic pace preparing nineteen different things at once. Everyone always asks me the obligatory, “if you need any help, let me know.” To which I always dishonestly reply with, “I sure will!” but I never do. No one works in my kitchen with me, but me. Sometimes Adrian is allowed, but really, I like to go it solo in there. I have a system of ins and outs, pass throughs, go arounds. I know where everything is and should go when I’m done. I can find anything in a third of a second and it only slows me down to have to explain, in minute detail, where to find something or how to chop something. If you don’t know what a Microplane or a Mandoline is or you can’t figure out how to chop the cilantro for salsa, then please….just pour yourself a glass of wine and put your feet up. I could really use the space. 
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High Protein Salad

Cheat days.

These words have haunted me for far too long. About eleven years now, if you’re counting.

I used to think that every day had to be a regimented, strict eating day and then only on the chosen day (or days in my case), could I indulge my true cravings. I would wait diligently until Friday night or Saturday night and then I would blow my calorie load (pardon me) on whatever I could get my newly toned hands on. After about ten years of on again off again dieting, crashing, splurging and guilt ridden excess, I think I finally found true balance. There are no cheat days. Never again will I call it those awful words. To cheat means to induce guilt, and we all know I have enough of that. From now on there will only be healthy living and healthy indulgence, for to have all work and no play makes Liz a dull girl. I will eat that beef rib and cornbread side with butter and I will drown it in chocolate porter. Then I’ll work out like I always do and I will feel no guilt. I will have my piece of chocolate cake and some bacon ice cream. People will wonder “how does she stay so skinny?” and they will ask me, as they always do. But I’m always truthful. Work out. Hard. Move your body. Every day. Pay attention to what you eat, don’t finish your kids plates, don’t drink your calories, water is always best.
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Yogurt Panna Cotta with Earl Grey Grapefruit Jam

I know what you’re thinking. Where are the guilty desserts, the luscious cream filled cakes covered in gooey frosting? Where are the guilt inducing sauced up meat filled dishes of yore? Where has the “guilty” in Guilty Kitchen gone?

Well, it’s still there, somewhere. It comes out every weekend or so when I like to indulge in a little meaty goodness at a good friend’s BBQ restaurant, but that is literally the only place I indulge for the most part. Here and there we have beer tastings with friends paired with many a cheese platter, meats, fresh baked sourdough and veggies and dip but for the most part I’m sticking to my healthy eating.

We try to keep meat eating down to once or twice a week, and again only because I have a big soft spot for BBQ and charcuterie. Everything else I’ll pass over for healthier options. I’m not dissing the meat eating world, this is just what works for me. For some the paleo diet is what works for them and I applaud them for it. I wish I could deal with that much meat. But I love my bread…..and beer. 
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